Archive for the ‘doomsday’ Tag

The Earth has been destroyed

Those of you who have been monitoring the International Earth Destruction Advisory Board’s Earth Destruction Alert level, mentioned in my previous blog entry, know that the Earth has been destroyed. The IEDAB has incremented their Geocide count to 1 and we are in condition red:

Current Earth-Destruction Status

The IEDAB indicates the following:

It is our duty to inform you that as of 7:35:05am UTC on September 10, 2008, the Earth has been destroyed.

The destruction of Earth was first reported by Mr Jonathan Barber of Wisconsin, United States, who spotted that his home-made seismic Earth Detector had ceased to give readings at around 8:00am (2am local time). Several other amateur geocide spotters noticed this at the same time but Mr. Barber was the first to place a telephone call to the IEDAB’s Geocide Hotline (+44 115 09Ω 4127, ask for Other Dave) at which point IEDAB officials performed an emergency check of their own instrumentation and verified Mr. Barber’s report, as well as fixing the exact time of geocide.

Evidence is still being collated, but preliminary results suggest that the Earth was destroyed pre-emptively by scientists at the Large Hadron Collider at CERN, Geneva, Switzerland, before the commencement of their experiments to locate the Higgs Boson, as a precautionary measure to ensure that the experiment itself could not result in the destruction of the Earth.

Whatever you do, don’t panic! The IEDAB has a helpful FAQ that I’d suggest you consult. Also, no doubt more news will be forthcoming shortly. I would also anticipate that there will be a memorial service for the Earth. I’ll forward information as it becomes available.

LHC about to come online

MSNBC’s science editor, Alan Boyle has a good story on the soon-to-be activated Large Hadron Collider, “Super-smasher targets massive mystery.”  It explains what scientists hope to find with the LHC in a bit more detail, albeit less musical aplomb, than the LHC rap.

Within a few years we might know why matter has mass, why there isn’t more antimatter in the universe, and whether or not there are more than three spacial dimensions!  Multiple spacial dimensions have long been predicted by string theorists, with nine or 10 being the most commonly hypothesized number of dimensions, but some think the number could be over 20. 

To date, there has been no experimental confirmation of string theory, which actually makes it a hypothesis and not a theory, as the terms are used by scientists.  It has proven to be very elegant mathematically and on paper, but has not made any empirically verified predictions that weren’t also predicted by other theories.  The discovery of other spatial dimensions would lend significant support to string theory.

Boyle mentions concerns that some people have that the LHC might destroy the Earth.  Scientists have determined that this is not possible, for a variety of reasons.  But if you still have concerns, the International Earth Destruction Advisory Board (IEDAB), an independent scientific institution which monitors the current status of the Earth and the number of times it has been destroyed, will be monitoring the situation.  On their site you can sign up to be alerted via e-mail if the Earth is destroyed, or you can check the current Earth Destruction Alert level.   Current status:

Current Earth-Destruction Status

As of this writing, we are in code green, indicating the Earth has not been destroyed.  In the event that it is destroyed, the EDA will change to code red.

Boyle will have more to say about the LHC in the coming days; if interested, be sure to check it out.   This is an exciting time for science and our understanding of the universe!